Femboy is a slang term that refers to males, usually cisgender, who express themselves with traditionally feminine behaviours, or—especially in the variant spelling femboi—to LGBTQ people of any gender identity who affect a "soft" masculine look. As an internet aesthetic, this may be through the use of jewellery, wearing feminine clothing and makeup, or expressing feminine behavioural qualities. Femboy can be used as both a sexual and non-sexual term; it does not denote a specific sexual orientation or gender role.
The term originated in the 1990s. It has since been popularised through internet forums and social media like TikTok, where trends such as "#femboyfriday" have received attention in the media. In gender studies, the term has also been used as an identifier for transgender individuals; in porn studies, the term has been seen as an identifier for a submissive role in intercourse and as exhibiting elements of sexual fantasy.
According to Dictionary.com, The term femboy originated in the 1990s and is a compound from the words fem (an abbreviation of feminine and femme) and boy.[1] [2] The variant femboi uses the LGBT term boi. By 2000, the term boi[3] had come to denote "a young, attractive gay man. The term "boi" has also been used, independently of any meaning related to sexuality, as an alternate spelling for boy".[4]
Femboy refers to a male or non-binary person using aesthetically and culturally female elements to express a more feminine side of the traditional male appearance;[5] Collins English Dictionary defines femboy as "a male whose appearance and behavioural traits are regarded as conventionally feminine".[6] According to Dictionary.com, the variant femboi may refer to "softer" individuals, such as young trans men or butch lesbians. Originally, the term was used as a pejorative against non-masculine men but has since been reappropriated,[7] although it may still be used as a slur against trans women. Femboy is a term of gender expression and does not define the sexual orientation or gender identity of an individual.
Along with terms like sissy, femboy is not used in a purely pornographic sense—it may be used to refer to a male involved in non-sexual cross-dressing or transvestic fetishism.[8] The label femboy is used on platforms such as Tumblr to signify a gay sex role similar to that of a female in Western culture; it is related to terms such as boywife and pussyboy in its usage to denote "self-identified effeminate androphilic males who exclusively seek to be penetrated by dominant, masculine men". Richard Vytniorgu argues that this sort of label "enables these bloggers to join together their sex-object choice and sex role in a form of subjectivity that others can identify with" and sees individuals using these labels as sharing a "bottom identity" with non-Western homosexuals.[9] Femboys have been fetishised, and femboy groups have been seen to be exclusionary in who they allow to participate, forming in-groups and out-groups.
A 2022 analysis of the most followed male creators on TikTok identified the presence of effeminate attributes, such as the use of hair dye and jewellery. The paper found that the platform's top creators were "quite homogeneous; [...] almost exclusively white, toned, and young, with perfect or near perfect facial symmetry and considerable bodily adornment", stating that the male creators used the term as a replacement to the labels of effeminate and gay.[10]
A femboy may engage in cross-dressing—garments associated with the femboy aesthetic include skirts, dresses, and knee highs.[11] Jules Joanne Gleeson claims 4chan femboys are "often but not always assisted by HRT." Many femboys idealise a feminine form with a flat chest, leading some to use medicines used in gender-affirming hormone therapy in combination with substances purported to stunt breast growth. The element of youth in femboy culture has raised questions on how long one can remain a femboy.
For male-to-female transgender people, being a femboy can be a way of avoiding the medical difficulties of transitioning. Gleeson also proposes the existence of the femboy as a method to escape both internal and external transphobia, alongside "the unique stigma" experienced by transgender women. She sees the femboy as a "self-made effeminate phenomenon" opposing traditional medical practice surrounding gender transition and as an example of "the erratic state of contemporary gender relations".[12]
Femboy is similar to the term shemale in that they both refer to individuals exhibiting masculine and feminine behaviors simultaneously; they express femininity in a delicate manner without the presence of the sexualised female body, such as large breasts. In the journal Porn Studies, Emerald Vaught sees femboys as encompassing both effeminate cisgender men and, despite this lack of corporeal femininity, bottoming transgender women. In pornography, she sees the femboy as sharing the idea of a "youthful appearance" with twinks and as "represent[ing] an element of sexual fantasy" of transgender femininity.
Femboy culture began to take shape in the United States in the 1990s. After the term was appropriated on the Internet, femboy communities began to form. Around 2018, the term femboy was found almost exclusively on 4chan, especially on the /lgbt/ forum. It later became popular on platforms such as Reddit and TikTok.[12] [7] Reddit has hosted both sexual and non-sexual femboy content. r/feminineboys was started in 2012 and had 264,000 members by July 2024; the site also contains pornographic communities like r/FemBoys.[13] [14] TikTok has been called a safe space in allowing freedom of gender expression.[15] The femboy aesthetic has been compared with figures in popular culture such as Harry Styles; viral trends such as "#FemboyFriday" and memes such as "Femboy Hooters" have helped to popularise the aesthetic.[7] [14] An unofficial femboy pride flag exists, which uses seven horizontal stripes with the colours pink, light pink, white, and light blue. These represent the feminine aesthetic, feminine behaviour, non-binary identities, and masculinity.[16]
According to Aye Lei Tun, femboy culture was present in Myanmar's Spring Revolution, protesting against the ruling military junta imposed after the 2021 coup d'état. In the protests, femboy outfits were used to gain exposure, with gender-nonconforming outfits being worn by non-femboy protestors. Tun sees the introduction of femboy culture, which was previously unfamiliar to Myanmar, as a tactic to lead towards a "social and cultural ideological revolution".[17] A 2021 publication by the ISEAS – Yusof Ishak Institute described femboy activity against the junta as causing "subversion of its assertion of rule", drawing comparison to opposition to United States involvement in the Vietnam War and the anti-war "make love, not war" slogan.[18]
See also: Queer heterosexuality. The femboy aesthetic has been described by Vice News as "breaking traditional norms of masculinity", demonstrating that "oppressive gender norms are slowly breaking down".[7] [15] On TikTok, the aesthetic has enjoyed popularity, although creators of femboy-style posts have received homophobic comments and violent threats.
Critics have seen femboys as perpetuating male dominance and disregarding existing discourse on gender identity.[19] An article by Marissa Lee in Mission criticised straight femboys for "claim[ing] responsibility for breaking such boundaries" and "do[ing] next to nothing for the conversation surrounding gender fluidity. If anything, [the existence of femboys] emphasises the all-encompassing maleness." An article in Social Media + Society has said the "femboy aesthetic" of the most popular content creators on TikTok "map[s] onto and reinforce extant patterns of gender inequality", and does little to challenge heteronormative views of masculinity:
When and if men cross gender boundaries [...], they do so while alluding to masculinities' hegemonic qualities, pairing their behaviours with lyrics and physical gestures that sexualize women and re-assert men's virility, bravado, and strength as a form of heterosexual recuperation.The alt-right have deemed the emergence of the femboy a result of the LGBT chemicals conspiracy theory, alongside "the existence of gender-morphing frogs"; figures such as Guillaume Faye have called the "effeminisation" of society an example of European societal decay.[20]