| Series: | Only Fools and Horses |
| Series No: | 2 |
| Episode: | 6 |
| Director: | Ray Butt |
| Producer: | Ray Butt |
| Length: | 30 minutes
|
| Prev: | The Yellow Peril |
| Next: | A Touch of Glass |
| Episode List: | List of Only Fools and Horses episodes |
"It Never Rains..." is an episode of the BBC sitcom Only Fools and Horses. It was the sixth episode of series 2, and was first screened on 25 November 1982. In the episode, Del, Rodney and Grandad go on holiday to Spain. All is going well until Grandad gets arrested.
It has been continuously raining for four days in Peckham, and the Trotters have not been able to sell any of their sun hats.
At The Nag's Head, Del Boy meets his friend Alex, an out-of-work travel agent. They discuss how they can boost their respective businesses, and Del suggests that Alex offer an 80% discount on a holiday to the next customer, who just so happens to be Del.
Back at the flat, Del tells Rodney and Grandad that they are going to Benidorm, Spain. Rodney is worried that Grandad will cramp their style.
When they get to Benidorm, Del and Rodney manage to pick up a couple of girls, but when they go back to their hotel room, they find Grandad asleep with his false teeth by his bedside. The girls leave in disgust.
A few days later, on the beach, Rodney and Del discuss how Grandad has been acting nervous and emotionally distant since they arrived. Del tries to impress a "French" woman but ends up embarrassing himself. Meanwhile, Rodney discovers that Grandad has been arrested and, after telling Del, the brothers search for Grandad.
At the police station, Grandad tells his grandsons a long and confusing story about a possible reason for his arrest: in 1936, when his family was poor, Grandad and his friend Nobby Clarke hitchhiked all the way to Southampton, got a boat to Tangier, and, after a failed attempt to join the French Foreign Legion, became gun-runners during the Spanish Civil War. Eventually, they were captured, Nobby was tortured, and the pair were deported to England. After hearing the story, Del bribes the guard into letting Grandad go, but it soon turns out that Grandad was arrested for only jaywalking and is free to go without charge, leaving Del out of pocket. Rodney says that they had better go to the drug store to get cotton wool for Grandad's cuts and bruises. When Grandad replies that he does not have any cuts and bruises, Del says: "It's early yet!".[1]
| Actor | Role | |
|---|---|---|
| David Jason | Derek Trotter | |
| Nicholas Lyndhurst | Rodney Trotter | |
| Lennard Pearce | Grandad Trotter | |
| Anthony Jackson | Spanish guard | |
| Michael Attwell | English man | |
| Jim McManus | Alex | |
| Jillianne Foot | English girl | |
| Anne Bruzac | French girl | |
| Graham Cole | Customs guard (uncredited) | |
| Shirley English | Woman in Pub (uncredited) | |
| Julie La Rousse | Julie (barmaid) |