Girlfriend experience explained

A girlfriend experience (GFE) is a commercial sex service. It ranges from a transactional sex relationship[1] to a client paying a sex worker to pretend to be his girlfriend during the session. If the sex worker is male, the service is called a boyfriend experience.

North America

In the sex industry of the United States and Canada, the term GFE is used to describe a sexual encounter in which the sex worker and the client provide each other with reciprocal sexual pleasure and some degree of emotional intimacy. The girlfriend experience, often provided through an escort agency, is a popular service that involves more personal interaction than a traditional call girl offers. There is a focus on not just having sex, but also having more of a comprehensive experience. The details vary widely.[2] The sex workers impart a sense of authenticity in order to make the experience more pleasurable for their customer, as well as to make the outcome more lucrative for themselves. According to sociologist Elizabeth Bernstein, this makes it more meaningful for both client and sex worker as it involves emotional labor.[3]

The term "client" is often used to describe a person who pays sex workers for sex. However, in the escort agency code that has grown up around the GFE, clients often call themselves "hobbyists" and refer to a sex worker who provides a GFE as a "nice girl". A GFE client pays for time spent with a sex worker, which can include social interaction, dating, or sexual acts. Many clients seek a feeling of closeness without the commitment of a relationship, and to a certain extent GFE can eliminate the feelings of guilt or fear of "addiction" that some people associate with a relationship.

Elements that make up a GFE such as conversation, affection and mutual sexual pleasure can occur in street prostitution but they are more commonly found in indoor prostitution. This includes the use of massage parlors, saunas, brothels, strip clubs and escort agencies. Some ranch brothels in the United States advertise themselves as GFE establishments, including Dennis Hof's Love Ranch South,[4] Moonlite Bunny Ranch,[5] Kit Kat Ranch,[6] Sheri's Ranch[7] and the Chicken Ranch.[8]

Southeast Asia

Research in Cambodia published in 2010 identified a number of waitresses and bartenders who were also working as "professional girlfriends" with "western boyfriends". They relied on these relationships for their livelihood but did not regard themselves as "prostitutes" and often sought love and marriage as well as material comforts. In these relationships, there was a performance of intimacy which lay somewhere between the feigned and the genuine.[1]

In Thailand, some independent sex workers are reported to work as "professional girlfriends", providing company and affection to foreign men and middle-class Thai men, and only having sex with their clients occasionally. Their remuneration is provided in the form of things such as clothing and visits to the cinema.[9] This sort of relationship, which lies between girlfriend and prostitute, exists as part of Thai culture and is often used by bargirls hoping to turn their foreign clients into boyfriends and husbands.[10] It is not uncommon for their one-night transactions to develop into relationships resembling holiday romances, with the couple travelling around the country as boyfriend and girlfriend.[11]

In the Philippines, Angeles City is known for the GFE provided to sex tourists by its sex workers, lasting anywhere from one night to a month or more. The US military facility Clark Air Base was located near the city until 1991.[12]

See also

Further reading

Notes and References

  1. Negotiating Intimacy: Transactional Sex and Relationships Among Cambodian Professional Girlfriends. Hoefinger. Heidi. 2010. Doctoral thesis. Goldsmiths, University of London. 2017-08-21. https://web.archive.org/web/20170821174742/http://research.gold.ac.uk/3419/. 2017-08-21. live.
  2. The real-life girlfriend experience. GQ. Anka Radakovich. 29 March 2012. 19 April 2012. https://web.archive.org/web/20120423054431/http://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/girls/articles/2010-05/17/gq-girls-anka-radakovich-on-the-girlfriend-escort-experience. 23 April 2012. live.
  3. Book: Sociology. Fulcher. James. Scott. John. Oxford University Press. 2011. 9780199563753. Oxford. 662.
  4. Web site: Menu - Love Ranch Vegas. loveranch.net. 1 November 2015. dead. https://web.archive.org/web/20151031213258/http://loveranch.net/menu---love-ranch-vegas.html. 31 October 2015.
  5. Web site: The Girlfriend Experience. Moonlite Bunny Ranch. 7 January 2018. https://web.archive.org/web/20180331034433/https://www.bunnyranch.com/tag/the-girlfriend-experience/. 31 March 2018. live.
  6. Web site: KitKat Ranch home page. KitKat Ranch website. 2019-12-16. https://web.archive.org/web/20190401141008/https://www.kitkatranch.com/. 2019-04-01. live.
  7. Web site: Sheri's Ranch Sex Menu. sherisranch.com. 11 April 2016. https://web.archive.org/web/20160412143828/http://www.sherisranch.com/sex%2Dmenu/. 12 April 2016. live.
  8. Book: Debating Sex Work. Jessica. Flanigan. Lori. Watson. Oxford University Press. 2019. 9780190659882. Debating Ethics Series. 123.
  9. News: Chia. Jasmine. Men and their mistresses. 24 September 2017. Bangkok Post.
  10. Book: Ervik, Kristianne. Embedded Entrepreneurship: Market, Culture, and Micro-Business in Insular Southeast Asia. https://books.google.com/books?id=weUTAAAAQBAJ&pg=PA135. BRILL. 2013. 9789004255296. The Superior Thai-Western Relationship: A Culturally Negotiated Re-embedding Practice. Eldar. Bråten. 135–136.
  11. Book: The Rough Guide to Thailand's Beaches & Islands. Apa Publications (UK) Limited. 2023. 9781839059315. 183.
  12. News: 'Do you ever think about me?': the children sex tourists leave behind. Margaret. Simons. 2 March 2019. The Guardian.