Don't Tell Me (Avril Lavigne song) explained

Don't Tell Me
Cover:Avril Lavigne – Don't Tell Me.png
Border:yes
Type:single
Artist:Avril Lavigne
Album:Under My Skin
B-Side:Take Me Away
Studio:
Genre:
Length:
  • (single version)
  • (album version)
Label:
Producer:Butch Walker
Prev Title:Mobile
Prev Year:2003
Next Title:My Happy Ending
Next Year:2004

"Don't Tell Me" is a song by Canadian singer-songwriter Avril Lavigne from her second studio album, Under My Skin (2004). "Don't Tell Me" was written by Lavigne and Evan Taubenfeld, while it was produced by Butch Walker. The song has been noted as having a "grungy sound".[2] "Don't Tell Me" was released on March 15, 2004, by Arista Records as the lead single from Under My Skin and peaked at number 22 on the US Billboard Hot 100 that same year. In an AOL Radio listener's poll, "Don't Tell Me" was voted Lavigne's ninth-best song.

Background and composition

"Don't Tell Me" has been noted as having a "grungy sound", which builds from a folk-rock verse to a hard rock chorus like a Morissette song[3] When asked what "Don't Tell Me" was about, Lavigne said:

She also said in a 2007 interview:

Some critics speculate that this song might be referring to Fred Durst, the lead singer of Limp Bizkit, whom she criticized in a 2004 interview with "Rolling Stone". "He took a private jet out to one of my shows, expecting me to bang him," Lavigne stated.[4] [5]

Critical reception

Reviewing the album Under My Skin, David Browne of Entertainment Weekly described "Don't Tell Me" as such: "Lavigne herself sounds more burdened; ... the ska8erboi of the first album has turned out to be a selfish, nasty creep who leaves when she won't go to bed with him". Blender Music wrote that unlike "Sk8er Boi", the up-with-abstinence single "Don’t Tell Me" finds her kicking him out of bed.[6] The Guardian was mixed: "Current single "Don't Tell Me" at least has some relevant advice to impart to her pubescent female fans: it depicts a confused and angry Lavigne fending off an over-eager boyfriend."[7]

PopMatters was favorable: "The first single, "Don't Tell Me", is probably the best song on the album, with the kind of wonderfully effusive movement that makes the best pop so damn irresistible. It starts slow and quiet, building to the first chorus, ebbs back, builds to another chorus, drops down into a bridge before coming back with a skull-crunching third chorus that leaves the riff firmly implanted in your skull. One or two reprises and we're out like a light, end of song. At that point you're either convinced or not."[8] Rolling Stone was positive: "The lead single, "Don't Tell Me," might be her most Avril-ish song yet, a petulant kiss-off to a horny boy. As the guitars get revved up behind her, she asks, "Did I not tell you that I'm not like that girl/The one who gives it all away, yeah/Did you think that I was going to give it up to you?" The syntax may be tortured, but the singer sounds just fine: a righteous prude, confidently fending off the creeps."[9] Yahoo Music! liked the song but was angry because there are spelling mistakes in booklet: "we now have a stronger, more confident Avril - forthright in her determination not to lose her cherry on 'Don't Tell Me', which coyly spells 'ass' with an 'a' and two asterixes on the CD booklet, bitterly writing songs about doomed relationships."[10]

Accolades

Award/PublisherYearCategoryResult
MTV Video Music Awardsalign=center 2004align=center Best Pop Videoalign=center [11]
MTV Video Music Brazilalign=center 2004align=center Best International Videoalign=center [12]
MuchMusic Video Awardsalign=center rowspan="2"align=center Best International Video By A Canadianalign=center rowspan="2"[13]
align=center People's Choice Favourite Canadian Artist
Radio Disney Music Awardsalign=center 2004align=center Best Songalign=center [14]
RTHK International Pop Poll Awardalign=center rowspan = "2" 2005align=center Super Gold Songalign=center rowspan="2"[15]
[16]
align=center Top Ten International Gold Songs

Commercial performance

"Don't Tell Me" debuted at number 22 on the US Billboard Hot 100, and it stayed on the chart for 20 weeks. On the US Adult Top 40 chart, it peaked at number 10 and remained on the chart for 26 weeks, while on Mainstream Top 40 chart, it reached number nine. The song was certified gold in the United States by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) for selling 500,000 digital copies of the single.

Music video

The accompanying music video for "Don't Tell Me" was directed by Liz Friedlander, and filmed in Los Angeles in March 2004.

Synopsis

The video tells the story of the song. It opens with Lavigne's boyfriend leaving her apartment. After taking her anger out on her bedroom and mirror, she follows him around the city. During the bridge of the song, her boyfriend sees her in many places at once, so he is feeling guilty and her feelings are weighing heavily on his mind. At the end of the video, she decides that he is better off without her and lets him walk away, and in the final shot she begins to float above the surface.

Reception

The video was nominated for Best Pop Video at the 2004 MTV Video Music Awards, but lost to No Doubt's video for "It's My Life".

Track listings and formats

  1. "Don't Tell Me" (single version) – 3:26
  2. "Don't Tell Me" (live acoustic) – 3:38
  3. "Take Me Away"  – 2:55
  1. "Don't Tell Me" (single version) – 3:26
  2. "Don't Tell Me" (live acoustic) – 3:38
  1. "Don't Tell Me" (single version) – 3:26
  2. "Take Me Away"  – 2:55

Credits and personnel

Credits and personnel are adapted from the Under My Skin album liner notes.[20]

Charts

Weekly charts

Chart (2004)Peak
position
Bolivia (Notimex)[21] 2
Canada (Nielsen SoundScan)[22] 5
Canada CHR/Pop Top 30 (Radio & Records)[23] 4
Canada Hot AC Top 30 (Radio & Records)[24] 3
Croatia (HRT)[25] 2
Europe (Eurochart Hot 100)[26] 8
Greece (IFPI)[27] 10
Japan (Oricon)[28] 35
Paraguay (Notimex)[29] 2
Peru (Notimex)[30] 5
Romania (Romanian Top 100)[31] 44
Uruguay (Notimex)[32] 5

Year-end charts

Chart (2004)Position
Australia (ARIA)[33] 98
Brazil (Crowley)[34] 51
Italy (FIMI)[35] 31
Netherlands (Dutch Top 40)[36] 95
Switzerland (Schweizer Hitparade)[37] 94
UK Singles (OCC)115
US Billboard Hot 100[38] 92
US Adult Top 40 (Billboard)[39] 27
US Mainstream Top 40 (Billboard)[40] 33

Release history

Region! scope="col"
DateFormat(s)Label(s)
United StatesMarch 15, 2004Arista[41]
AustraliaApril 19, 2004CD[42]
DenmarkApril 26, 2004[43]
Germany[44]
JapanApril 28, 2004
United KingdomMay 10, 2004[45]

External links

Notes and References

  1. Web site: Avril Lavigne (Apple Music) . Apple Music . September 19, 2020 . (2004's post-grunge earworm "Don’t Tell Me").
  2. Web site: "the guitars come in and there's a suitably grungy sound to work with" . September 8, 2014 . December 21, 2014 . https://web.archive.org/web/20141221131805/http://music.thedigitalfix.com/content/665/avril-lavigne-review.html . dead .
  3. Web site: Pareles . Jon . MUSIC; The Solipsisters Sing Out Once Again . NY Times . February 6, 2020 . 2004 . In Don't Tell Me, which builds from a folk-rock verse to a hard rock chorus like a Morissette song, she kicks out a guy who pressures her for sex: Don't try to tell me what to do/Don't try to tell me what to say, she sings..
  4. Web site: Freire . Juan Manuel . Las 10 mejores canciones de Avril Lavigne . Santander Music . 15 July 2024 . Spanish . 2024 . Some speculate that this might be referring to Fred Durst, the lead singer of Limp Bizkit.
  5. Web site: Scaggs . Austin . Q&A: Avril Lavigne . Rolling Stone . 15 July 2024.
  6. Web site: Review: Avril Lavigne – Under My Skin . November 26, 2014 . dead . https://archive.today/20101219111339/http://www.blender.com/guide/new/52201/under-my-skin.html . December 19, 2010.
  7. Web site: Avril Lavigne, Under My Skin . . November 26, 2014 . dead . https://web.archive.org/web/20090429103240/http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/2004/may/21/popandrock.shopping5 . April 29, 2009.
  8. Web site: Avril Lavigne: Under My Skin . November 26, 2014 . dead . https://web.archive.org/web/20080923235335/http://www.popmatters.com/music/reviews/l/lavigneavril-under.shtml . September 23, 2008.
  9. Avril Lavigne Under My Skin Album Review. Rolling Stone. June 10, 2004. November 26, 2014.
  10. Web site: Avril Lavigne – Under My Skin . November 26, 2014 . dead . https://web.archive.org/web/20110718135335/http://uk.launch.yahoo.com/040602/33/1wp8w.html . July 18, 2011.
  11. Web site: MTV Video Music Awards 2004. https://web.archive.org/web/20080908111554/http://www.mtv.com/ontv/vma/2004/. dead. September 8, 2008. MTV News. MTV Networks. August 7, 2011. To see the nominations, click on the "winners" parameter.
  12. Web site: MTV anuncia indicados ao VMB 2004; D2 e Rappa lideram . LOIOLA. THOMPSON . October 5, 2004. UOL. pt. October 18, 2009.
  13. News: MMVA 2004 Winners. Soul Shine. June 22, 2004. July 12, 2016. August 15, 2016. https://web.archive.org/web/20160815051451/http://www.soulshine.ca/news/newsarticle.php?nid=767. dead.
  14. Web site: The winners of the 2004 Radio Disney Music Awards . hilaryfan.com. August 23, 2006 . December 29, 2011.
  15. Web site: 第十六屆國際流行音樂大獎. https://web.archive.org/web/20050614000123/http://www.rthk.org.hk/special/16poppoll/. dead. June 14, 2005. June 14, 2005.
  16. Web site: avrilfans.de Award 2003. December 27, 2009.
  17. Don't Tell Me. Avril Lavigne. 2004. Australian CD single liner notes. Arista Records. 82876614112.
  18. Don't Tell Me. Avril Lavigne. 2004. European CD single liner notes. Arista Records. 82876608412.
  19. Don't Tell Me. Avril Lavigne. 2004. Japanese CD single liner notes. Arista Records. BVCA-29607.
  20. Avril Lavigne. Under My Skin. 2004. CD liner notes. Arista. 82876-59774-2.
  21. News: Belinda aumenta su popularidad. es. El Siglo de Torreón. May 24, 2004. March 17, 2023. March 17, 2023. https://archive.today/20230317095039/https://www.elsiglodetorreon.com.mx/noticia/2004/belinda-aumenta-su-popularidad.html. live.
  22. Avril Lavigne Chart History (Canadian Digital Songs). Billboard. June 30, 2020.
  23. R&R Canada CHR/Pop Top 30. Radio & Records. 1552. 29. April 23, 2004. October 14, 2020.
  24. R&R Canada Hot AC Top 30. Radio & Records. 1558. 57. June 4, 2004. May 9, 2024.
  25. Web site: HR Top 20 Lista. Croatian Radiotelevision. dead. https://web.archive.org/web/20040626124131/http://www.hrt.hr/hr/top20/maineng.html. June 26, 2004. March 7, 2021.
  26. Hits of the World – Eurocharts. Billboard. 116. 22. 57. May 29, 2004. June 30, 2020.
  27. Web site: Top 50 Singles Εβδομάδα 6–12/6. IFPI. el. dead. https://web.archive.org/web/20040611134544/http://www.ifpi.gr/chart03.htm. June 11, 2004. June 30, 2020. See Best Position column.
  28. Web site: アヴリル・ラヴィーンのシングル売り上げランキング. Avril Lavigne's Singles Sales Rankings. Oricon. ja. dead. https://web.archive.org/web/20100831093011/http://www.oricon.co.jp/prof/artist/300502/ranking/cd_single/. August 31, 2010. November 4, 2013.
  29. News: Se impone en Sudamérica.... es. El Siglo de Torreón. June 21, 2004. March 17, 2023. live. March 17, 2023. https://archive.today/20230317100437/https://www.elsiglodetorreon.com.mx/noticia/2004/se-impone-en-sudamerica.html.
  30. News: Belinda aumenta su popularidad. es. El Siglo de Torreón. May 24, 2004. March 17, 2023. March 17, 2023. https://archive.today/20230317095039/https://www.elsiglodetorreon.com.mx/noticia/2004/belinda-aumenta-su-popularidad.html. live.
  31. Web site: Arhiva romanian top 100 – Editia 26, saptamina 28.06 – 4.07, 2004. Romanian Top 100. ro. live. https://web.archive.org/web/20050514170226/http://www.rt100.ro/editie-top-100_x10125.html. May 14, 2005. October 5, 2018.
  32. News: Belinda aumenta su popularidad. es. El Siglo de Torreón. May 24, 2004. March 17, 2023. March 17, 2023. https://archive.today/20230317095039/https://www.elsiglodetorreon.com.mx/noticia/2004/belinda-aumenta-su-popularidad.html. live.
  33. Web site: ARIA End of Year Singles Chart 2004. Australian Recording Industry Association. January 11, 2020.
  34. Web site: Brazilian Top 100 Year-End 2004. April 3, 2018. Crowley Broadcast Analysis. January 30, 2022.
  35. Web site: Mix e singoli. FIMI. it. dead. https://web.archive.org/web/20060510005652/http://www.fimi.it/documenti/Classifiche_TUTTE_2004.pdf. May 10, 2006. December 17, 2020.
  36. Web site: Top 100–Jaaroverzicht van 2004. Dutch Top 40. nl. January 11, 2020.
  37. Web site: Schweizer Jahreshitparade 2004. hitparade.ch. de. January 11, 2020.
  38. Web site: Billboard Top 100 – 2004. Billboardtop100of.com. August 14, 2020.
  39. Web site: Year-End Charts – Hot Adult Top 40 Singles & Tracks – 2004. Billboard.biz. 2004. November 7, 2021. https://web.archive.org/web/20121009071806/http://www.billboard.biz/bbbiz/charts/yearendcharts/2004/atftitl.jsp. October 9, 2012.
  40. 2004 The Year in Charts: Most-Played Mainstream Top 40 Songs. Billboard Radio Monitor. 12. 51. 22. December 17, 2004.
  41. Going for Adds. Radio & Records. 1546. 24. March 12, 2004.
  42. Web site: The ARIA Report: New Releases Singles – Week Commencing 19th April 2004. ARIA. 26. April 19, 2004. dead. https://webarchive.nla.gov.au/awa/20040606140000/http://pandora.nla.gov.au/pan/23790/20040607-0000/ISSUE738.pdf. June 6, 2004. November 9, 2021.
  43. Web site: Avril Lavigne: Single. click2music.dk. da. https://web.archive.org/web/20040603065419/http://www.click2music.dk/denmark/default.asp. June 3, 2004. November 5, 2023. To view release date, select Lavigne Avril from Vælg kunster (A - Å), then click on Don't Tell Me.
  44. Web site: Don't Tell Me . Amazon Germany .
  45. New Releases: Singles. Music Week. 29. May 8, 2004.

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